Spontaneous Conception (October 2019, Week 2, day 1)
“Honey, you’re just going to need to give Mama a minute, maybe a lot of minutes.” Tanya held her head as she hoped the words she directed at the floor would reach her daughter the right way. The bathroom floor was cool, and the room was dark. If only she could have stayed there forever. The soft rumble from the other side of the door was all she needed to hear. Fifteen minutes wasn’t forever, but it would hopefully be enough time for her to get her shit together.
Getting pregnant again wasn’t supposed to have happened. Tanya was still sorting through the details. Sorting through them between trips to the bathroom and hiding her condition from everyone around her while she figured out what the hell she was going to do next. One child per person, as assigned – how long had she known that rule? The shift had started before she’d developed enough to be one of the breeders so it’s not like it was new. She’d done as she was told from the start, presenting herself to the clinic for testing and synching at sixteen. She’d interviewed the men who qualified to pair with her and had chosen wisely. That pregnancy had been sanctioned and monitored from the moment of conception. The birth had happened as scheduled. She had, or so she’d been told, been sterilized before leaving the hospital and shifted into the role of raising her daughter for the role they would choose for her. This? This wasn’t how it was supposed to go.
Getting her daughter to her assigned post was today’s priority, and for that to happen she’d have to let go of the basin. Tanya dragged herself up to standing and looked at her reflection. She prodded the flesh under her eyes and around her mouth until she was satisfied that nothing from the neck up would give her away. As long as no one got in her way she should be able to get back to the safety of home within thirty minutes.
“Baby, let’s go. Mama’s ready.” Seeing the sun as she neared the front door, Tanya winced and smiled. “Perfect,” she muttered, grabbing the large sunglasses from the shelf next to her. “Hustle, baby. Being late isn’t an option.”
Getting her daughter this assignment hadn’t been easy. Tanya froze as she placed a hand on her belly. Was the pregnancy why she’d been successful? Did they know already? “Keep it together, T,” she said under her breath. Conspiracy theories were more than she had the stomach for at the moment.
Tanya watched as her daughter wheeled down the hallway towards her. There was a good chance that she wouldn’t see her first-born again, depending on how this assignment went. The same old feelings pulled at Tanya. It never got easier, and now would she have to go through them doubled? There were reasons people were only supposed to have one child.
“You look ready. More ready than I am. Let’s go.”